Friday, January 30, 2009
I was sitting in the living room of my mother’s home having a discussion with other family members.
Words were said not to accuse me of false behavior but I took it as an accusation and felt antagonized. I don’t think that I would have been bothered by it, but my character was not where it needed to be.
While the words were being spoken, I was eating garlic bread. I inhaled a small bit and it went down the wrong tube. I was coughing, choking and trying to speak to stop the rudeness with cordial words of admonition. I could not speak. The antagonism continued. I needed to speak and stop the incrimination. I became out of control and getting some words out spoke with vulgar harshness.
Our words really do matter.
What else mattered is that my character was not strong enough to restrain negative words in the time of most importance. My character was strained and then broke. I didn’t express myself in the most honorable way. I felt diminished.
In the past, in adverse situations, I have been aware of negative emotions building up in me, but I was still able to think and stay clear headed. Those situations was not under duress. Under duress is when it matter most.
With the world, strong forceful words or behavior is a positive trait. I’ve experienced it while doing business with so many people.
The decisions we make, the way we speak and behave ultimately show are true character.
I’m trying to have the most excellent character, character that invites growth and prosperity in me and others. Not to be superior but to serve others. Serving others is the only way we can make every one’s life choice and prosperous.
I need to be vigilant; to change were it is right and not be manipulated by the world.
I hope you striving for the character that you want.